Random

For every ending, there would be the beginnings. In order for beginnings to happen, you need luck/ chance. I guess it is stated somewhere that my luck is slightly weird in the sense I would have to encounter a thousand and one different paths (both weird, challenging and perhaps a little tilt-y).

They say another day means another new hope. But from my point of view, it’s pretty much the same. Hope is just like a piece of white paper; white, decent, difficult to caress and sometimes may be deathly. It looks promising but at the end of the day, won’t do any good. Therefore, stop hoping for something that is not bound to happen anytime soon – not likely.

Empty is another friendly word of the day. It seems this word has made its recurring and consistent visit to this cranium skull of mine – pretty much daily. The empty feeling is not likely to draw out the passion in you but it sorts of sucks out the fun humane part of an individual leaving the hollow, void and vacant spaces crammed with pervade sunken barren sentiment numbness.

No more

No more

Sweet kiss,
Tight hugs,
Thoughtful texts,
No more.

Heartaches,
Drown in tears no more.
Excuses,
Forking up lies no more.

Overwhelmed
with heartaches,
love and lies.
Dead but alive.

Love no more,
Sympathize no more,
Feel no more.
That's what I am - a hollow heartless lass.


Copy right reserved @Nabila Johari

Random

Sometimes I think I could not care less about what others might think of me as I'm the one living the life and not them. At times, I cared too much of what others say and judge me. It hurts to suffer the consequences of making a mistake but somehow, I guess every human being should suffer for their mistakes. I know not about making a proper amendments as I was thought to directly forgive others and forget their mistakes without even uttering the word 'Sorry' or 'I apologize' but considering every breathing soul is a unique entity requiring different styles.

Poem - Insignificantly Worthless

Insignificantly worthless

A pair of deadly eyes,

Unlike anything before,

A stare,

Enough to shaken every breathing soul.

That husky voice,

The deep, deep voice

Soothes all aches, calms every sadness.

Yet, that same voice,

Destroys.

Your caring side,

Invaded such flimsy robust-ed hub of mine

Resulting frantic beating pulsation and reaction

Sudden emotion impediment

Causing irreparable tear down,

A break down perhaps even

dis-continue-ment of spirit.

Glad to be of amusement,

with the laughs, thoughts and thinking.

What’s more of the hours spent talking,

And texting.

Never had it coming

That I would fall this hard

Feelings are thought sacred

Somehow, were considered worthless.

Insignificantly worthless.

Copy rights reserved @ Nabila Johari.

Speeches

Hello. I noticed the fact that I seldomly update this space. Let's just say my hands are pretty tied at the moment - well, most moment. However, here's some piece I'd like to share. Recently,

1. I have started to write - again. But this time, I'm not up for the journal/ diary type of writing. I began writing poem. Yes, POEM.

2. I have fallen in and out of love too many times till the point that I lost count and am really afraid of jumping or diving in again at this moment.

3. I have discovered who my real friends are even though sometimes I feel like I wanna chop off all their hairs and perform voodoo stuff to make them listen. But hey, at least they're here when I need them the most. They ALWAYS are.

4. I find myself addicted to VAMPIRE DIARIES. And I think Ian Somerhalder is sooo HOTTTT.

5. I realized that life is sometimes a bitch. But no matter shitty the day might be, tomorrow is going to be another day just like the quote below

'Going to be a kick-ass day. NO matter what your circumstances may be.Seems that is,the ONLY way to tackle it..Anyone?' Quoted from Ian Somerhalder.

6. I realized one of the most important part in life is to take risks and chances being given to me even though I'm scared of doing it alone. After all, if I keep on sitting in my comfort zone, when am I growing right ?

Poem - Significant

Significant

Twas the day,

Sunny yet cloudy,

Lovely,

And there it was.

A hundred and seventy,

Red headed-Ly,

round, fulfilling eyes,

Captivating,

Mesmerizing

Long dark brownish locks,

Silver eyes,

Shining upon the moonlight rays,

Dearly charming

And hypnotizing

Strong lingering looks

Exchanged,

Hanging around

Enthralled each soul

Miniscule the minute

Insignificant body

Alhamdulillah

SIFE training held 27th to 29th January 2012 helped me gain new insights. Thank you. During training, I realized loads of things.

1. I'm going to be really busy with SIFE stuff, presentation, annual dinners.
2. Preparing for projects.
3. Studying

Therefore, I concluded, to be working all the time. Sorry Jase, I've decided not to continue o ur relationship anymore. I'll do it my way just as you wish with yours.

It's done

Alright. We broke up. I know I posted the new of our get together and all. But the truth is, yea. Our relationship ended. Reason ? Because of the stupid mistake I made. Oh well. Lesson learnt.

1. Don't trust guys anymore (for the time being).
2. Long-distance relationships don't work that well unless both parties understand each other very well.
3. Trust your partner (if you don't, there's no point of starting a relationship).
4. Try your very best to work things out even though it is just a minor misunderstanding.

I know I might not be a really great or a good girlfriend that is able to be there for the boyfriend 24/7 but note that I'll try my best to do so.

To Jason, take care. I wish you well. Indeed, neither you nor I have the intention to start afresh again. I know.

2012

Today's date marked January 22nd 2012. Twenty-two days after new year. Still, I felt like the year is still the same (2011). Perhaps it was because there are not much happening events that took place. Nevertheless, it's still a good year. I'm grateful to have been able to breathe in the air today and will keep on breathing for the next day everyday - Insyallah.

I'm more active on facebook and twitter currently as I find it much entertaining to stay connected with friends as well as keeping myself filled with the latest gossip and news on tonnes of stuff.

Alrighy then. Hmm. I started this year (2012) with exams in which I believe most public university students are experiencing the same thing. However, I would say that my results for this semester would considerably not be a good result. Why ? Simple. LINGUISTICS. I wish there's be a system where I could 'donate' one grade of my previous marks to make it better. Still, it's just a dream.

11/11/11

It's 11/11/11
On this day, most people believe that if we wish for something, our wishes might actually come true. Why? Because it's a beautiful date perhaps?

I don't really believe about wishing on certain particular date as I'm a muslim. But just so you know, I wish for the above every single day to come true:

1. I wish for a miracle to happen to me (I'm grateful for what I have right now)
2. I wish I would be able to breathe in this air I'm breathing today, tomorrow and as long as Allah is giving me the life.
3. I wish to have a healthy, harmonious, calming life with my loved ones.
4. I wish to be a better person, a better muslimah, a better friend, a better daughter, a good student, a good girlfriend, a good wife in the future.
5. I wish to live this life truly and to the fullest.
6. I wish for all good things to happen along with obstacles that I'll be facing. If there are not obstacles, life would be dull.
7. I wish everyone would be happy with what they are doing, that they would love themselves truly.
8. I wish if I were to die anytime soon, Allah, tolong tetapkan iman saya. Saya nak mati dalam keadaan beriman dan menutup aurat.
9. I wish to apologize to everyone whose directly or indirectly hurt by me. I apologize. Do forgive me.

Breast Cancer

Hey guys. I've decided to post about breast cancer this time. Why? Simply because I'm a girl, I have a high tendency to suffer from breast cancer and because I feel that this should be shared.

Anyways, there are tonnes of ways that can be done to prevent cancer from happening and one of them is through correct eating habits. Due to that, here are 10 types of foods that we (girls) should consume. Why? I'd say they help to fight the cancer cells from spreading! :)


1. Whole grain foods such as wholemeal bread.
2. Walnuts because they contain healthy fatty acids that slows down the breat cancer cells growth.
3. Ground flaxseed.
4. Natural sweetness such as honey.
5. Garlic.
6. Cinnamon.
7. Eggs.
8. Berries like grapes because they contain high content of anti-oxidant.
9. Fish
10. Carrots.
11. Promegranates.
12. Green tea.
13. Sweet potatoes.
14. Seaweed.
15. Soy products.

That's quite a long list people. Anyways, the foods listed are not so bad right? I mean, most of the are pleasantly eatable. Therefore, try it. It's good for our health. Let's live our life cancer free! :D

Smile

Seems like this new semester have been really chaotic for me. Things come tumbling down one by one - both the good and the bad. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Sometimes I'd wish for it to fall down slowly. Let me have a rest then only come again. But then again, Allah has plans for me. I hope it's good for all the pain and difficulties he put me into test.

Anyhow, despite all the not so good stuff happening, I'm going to write about the good stuff. At least, ada la jugak something best nak ingat tak ? :)

Whatever it is, motive utama update blog ni is to share picture of my loved ones la. Tak kesah la ade org baca or tak baca pun blog ni, I know my friends baca sometimes <3.

Ni Krew MTM 2011/2010 untuk KTHO. They're cool !

Taken at Zaty's open house - Qila, Ann and Me

Explorace during MTM - Qila and Habe :)

Ka Mun, Zaty, Qila and me

Yes, we're KHTO Crew's who's obviously lazing around during important talks =,=

My classmate and coursemate - 2SPL 2011/2012

Qila and Ann - MTM week

Me and Shuan Jy - Yes, he's cute ! :)

Life goes on

It has been a while since last updated this blog. Yes. Apparently, I quit being the Director of External Relations so that I won't be too busy attending meeting, going to appointments and et cetera. Pendek cerita, nak spend time with my loved ones especially my parents, my boyfriend (but dah tak ada rezeki), my friends and myself. Heck! After what happened, I changed my mind. I did quit the Director position and I became the Senior Member for Special Task Force for Member Development in ER. Kiranya, I'll be attending meeting once in 2 weeks, need to make presentations and need to read alot about entrepreneurship stuff. Okay la tu. At least there's something for me to do. Plus, I'n involved in this Green Generation event. Dapat portfolio protocol lagi (YEAYY!). The position I've been dreaming of since my first year. Finally dapat!. Then, ada AIESEC Discovery day on 1st of October along with English Workshop organized by ELSP on 1,2,8,9 of Oct 2011. Takde la boring sangat right? Not forgetting need to study a little extra untuk upgrade pointer. Subjects are getting tougher. Still, thank you emak, abah, qilah, ann, habe and everyone yg bagi support and stick with me through think and thin. Even though I look like a person yang mcm tak ada perasaan, serious, workaholic and mean, I do care. I just don't show it.

I'll return the favour. That's not a promise. That's what I do. :)

LIARS

Okay, hari ni nak update blog. Recently, I've been busy with MTM and AIESEC and SIFE. Nak buat mcmana, eden memang suka join club2 ni. Best. Dapat experience plus gained new friends. It's good for networking and marketing :D. Plus, MTM ni, dapat jumpa juniors college lain. It's so cool. All this while, always exposed with friends and people of the same faculty and course kind of made my social skills worse day by day. At least meeting people of different courses, I learnt some new things. Learned how to become emcee for informal gatherings and etc. It's fun and challenging at the same time. In the very beginning, it's humiliating and all but overall, it builds confidence.

The little details maybe will update later. Now tengah sakit hati. Before post benda2 yg lagi teruk, baik tenangkan diri dulu. Tc people.
Anyhow, happy2 dekat MTM, I was dumped / we broke up. Nak comment banyak2, tak elok cuz benda dah lepas. But anyhow, lesson learnt. Long distance relationship memang penat. Kalau tak tahan, better jangan start. Kalau nak try jugak, tolong la setia. Jangan tau janji and all but tak reti nak keep janji. I'm not saying I'm the good ones because I made tonnes of mistakes in my life and trying to be better than before. Mungkin Allah nak tunjuk or something. Thank you Allah.

I'm okay with me. How about you ?

Hey guys. Recently, I've been told and listened to some of my friends responding to the negative talks that bad people label them. Upon reading their blog post, they reminded me of the incident that caused me to be how I am today.

I am not like how you know me now
I was weak and a helpless girl
Not to mention stupid and a nerd
Whom is incapable to even to stand up and read aloud when asked

I am the girl who is constantly bullied by big boys
Who took my plasticine and threw it in the dustbin
Who can only cry and watch
Helplessly

I am the short, fat, dark and ugly girl
Whom you said could not be any less ugly than this
Yes. I am that girl
Who heigh about 145 cm
And is unable to wear my 'tudung' properly
without the help of my teacher to fix it

I am the very same girl whom people said
Could never be the real biological daughter to both parents
because of the nothing in resemblance
Whom you could just push me aside
and hurt my feelings recklessly
I am HER

I am the one whom you said STUPID
I am the one whom you MOCK in class
I am the girl you push aside in class
I am the girl who is always alone having one good companion
Whom I would defend when he needs me - My good friend

Now,
I'm strong, energetic and might still be a nerd
I can make presentations in front of people easily
I can even talk without script confidently
I have a loud voice which made me unique
No more crying, being helpless when being pushed around
I am brave enough to voice out my opinion

I am not fat, dark, short nor ugly no more
I am chubby
I have tanned skin
I am 164 cm tall
And I am blessed with a mix-ed complexion
I inherited my mother's eyes
Skin, height and frame from my father's

I could not care less how you judged me no more
I AM ME
I'm not you
I'm perfect in every way like what Allah made me
I'm thankful for that

I PROVED you wrong
I'm HERE doing what I love - studying
It's hard - but it's worth it

You made me into what I am today
I'm a little heartless
A little bold and rude
A little of this and that
But hey,
I'm nice to good people
because they deserve it
YOU DON'T
Not a single bit

Forgive me
En light me to favour you
Please

P/S : Copyright reserved. IF you intend to use some parts of this work, do acknowledge the writer. Thanks ! This post is a little long but thanks for your time ! :D

Iskandar

Hello ! Yes. It has been ages since I last update this blog of mine. Too lazy to do it actually. Actually, I wanna talk about a guy named Iskandar. Who's he ? He's my standard 6 classmate. I have not met him for 8 years since I moved out of town and alhamdulillah, I met him online today. (^.^). Goshh. It's something really happy and meaningful to meet your old classmate who seems to remember you. And guess what, he's MARRIED ! OMGOMGOMGOMG ! Kawen awal ! Comel ! 24th July hari tu. OMG. Memang reaction ni melampau but i just can't help it. I LOVE WEDDINGS ! They're so cute, pretty, and magical ! Anyway Is, have a blissful marriage okay. Take care of your wife alright. I believe you're a great guy like you were a great kid before. Best wishes dude :)

Ernie

Hey,
Let me introduce my solely sweetheart Ernie. I met her in 2009 but we became close in 2010. And since then, we're inseparable ! She's petite, skinny, sweet, kuat merajuk and banyak karenah ! HAHA. Sorry Ernie. Either way, I love her. Banyak precious memories dengan Ernie ni. We slept side by side finishing our writing subject last minute assignment sampai subuh. Then the very same morning, we kena stage our drama 'A LETTER FROM THE STAR'. With panda eyes and muka sembab ditambah dengan make-up, we did it !
Seriously, I missed acting, gossiping, memujuk, crying and flirting with this girl. Hugs and kisses tak payah cerita la. I missed those ! Part nak pujuk you merajuk, is my best part. I kenyit2 sikit je you dah senyum. And and time kita nangis together. Best kan ? You were lying on my lap and I comb your hair while you were telling me what made you cried. And kita story jugak dekat bridge Dang Anum. Practice singing and dancing untuk drama sampai pagi. Not to mention siap berblanket semua helping Izul and Fiqa siapkan script. GOSHH. Also time kita teringin nak makan KFC. After class, kita together with Mail naik bus from Lendu pegi Alor Gajah. It was gila but I enjoyed it. Hilang mengidam semua tu. HAHAHA. Ohh ! And last Saturday and Sunday (13 and 14 August 2011), I met her dekat Melaka Sentral (MC). She's working dekat kedai optic. Masa nampak dia, rasa nak jerit and nangis pun ada. But when I saw her, tak boleh nak cakap the happy feeling. The same feeling when I met my roomies. Babe, I love you tau. I'll always be here if you need me okay. Always.

P/S : Sorry la jiwang sweetie. Kinda used to it with you. :P Ohh . Abaikan fenomena gambar blur tuu. Janji bole kenal kira okay. HIHI

My Forever Roomies

Hello !

Yes. As seen above and in the MINE page tab, this is my forever roomies. I've known them since 2009 up until now. Yes. We've been through rough and sweet times together. They're there with me all the time. During my painful break-up with my ex and so forth. I couldn't have asked for another roomies other than you guys. Even though we rarely call or text and keep in contact, still, you guys are the best ! Memang tak cari room mate lain dah. I love you girls ! Sukbean, thank you for the delicious food masa asasi dulu. Kenyang kitaorg semua. Dona, I miss masak maggi banyak2 with you. Not forgetting kita makan cereals (KokoKrunch) for breakfast, lunch adn dinner. LOL . Lastly, Izul. Even though you're the smallest and the cutest among all of us, you mean as much as both Beans and Dona to me. Without you, PTSL 2A will be a living hell. Thank for the awesome script for our play 'A LETTER FROM THE STAR'. I loved my popular character. And, thank you each of you guys for the hugs and kisses and temankan aku time aku baru break-up dulu. You guys made the pain endured a lot less painful and easy. Now, even though we're far apart; Izul in USM, Beans and Dona is in UiTM KBM and I'm in UTM, still, you're here with me. Always. I love you girls. <3 

P/S : From left: Bella, Sukbean, Izul and Dona. 

Girly facts 101

Here's some girly facts about girls. Hope it helps !

1. Girls are highly unpredictable in terms of behaviour they would exhibit.
2. Girls like to gossip.
3. Girls love it when her guy hugs or cuddles her from behind. They'll feel secure and safe.
4. Girls get butterflies with all the stuff to do with the guy she loves/like such as receiving text message and calls.
5. Naturally, girls are more talkative than boys.
6. A girl loves to be pulled by the waist by her guy.
7. Girls can be tricked and lied easily. However, the chances of revealing the truth is high.
8. Girls love it when their guy shows his affection in public.
9. Even though a girl is in a relationship, she likes to be chased by other guys. It makes us feel confident.
10. Girls use sarcasm towards the guy they like because she's afraid to confess that she admires him.
11. Girls don't like to be called 'babe', 'hot', 'sexy'. Just call them using their name.

P/S : Most of the facts are TRUE. Depends how you guys view it. Positive or negative. Have a pleasant day !  Personally, number 3 - 11 works for me. HAHAHA. Comel kot benda alah ni.

One of my favourites

I've been listening to this song over and over a million times. The lyrics are just beautiful and meaningful. Biasa la bila dah malam macam ni, mood romantic habes.