Mikail

Dear Mikail ,

This is going to be the very last time I'm confessing my feelings to you. I'm moving on after this. I like you. Really liked you since the very beginning when we met online. I couldn't care much about how not photogenic you are and also I could not care about your perv-ness much because I was hoping that one day you could be better. I have faith in you. After almost 3 years of being friends, unfortunately, you were hopeless. In terms of IT stuff, you're a champ ! But when it comes to girls, and feelings, YOU SUCK. I apologize for being this rude but this is just how I feel. I don't blame you for being immature but the thing is, you have to GROW UP ! Sampai bila you nak stay main PSP tu ? Asyik main game mcm tak ingat benda lain. Sampai bila ? Sampai you realize that you're 30 is it ? Sampai you dah tua ?

Look, I'm not here to yell or humiliate what else scold you. It's just that I care about you a lot. I've given hints, tips and loads of info you need to know about girls and motivation to keep you motivated in life whenever I think you need it. Look around you. You have eyes. Use them to SEE instead if LOOKING. What's the point of having them if you can't see me because I'm right in front of you this whole time.

You know what's sad ? Firstly, I have to admit it is my fault that maybe you're shocked or surprised with the way I professed my feelings the other night.

Mikail, undeniably I can read you like an open book. I know most of the things that you like and the things that you don't. Let me ask you this, what do you know about me ? Other than the things that I told you. What do you know ? It is really devastating for me that you could not even distinguish my voice when I switched my phone with my friend. You did not even noticed I was gone at that particular time. You can't tell when I'm angry or being sarcastic. Did you know that I have different smiles each time ? Did you know that I have at least 3 facial expression that I always do ? Did you know that I'm in love with you through my actions without me uttering it ? From all of the above, I can assure that all the answers for the question is NO. You did not know. You have eyes but you can't see.

Mikail, I don't want to hear you to talk to me about games every single time when we Skyped. I don't want to watch you playing games on your PC and PSP when we Skype because I did not Skype with you to watch that. I Skyped you because I want to see YOU. To know how you're doing. I just want some of your time. To steal and divert some of your attention to me. Not some PSP games and et cetera. I want you to talk to me about stuff not related to IT, games, gadget, world facts and perv things. I want you to talk to me as a person with feelings. Ask me normal daily routine stuff. I want to have a normal grown up / matured conversation with you.

But that was then. After you decided to be passive by not answering any of my calls, text messages and through chat, I'm putting an end to it. Goodbye. Thanks a lot for breaking my heart. Thanks a bunch for making me care, for making me worried sick and for making me puzzled on what wrong I did you. Most importantly, thanks a lot for making me love you. Yes, you win. You know what sucks the most ? It just sucks big time when you really care about someone, and it turns out that he is just not that into you and that he is just interested in something else you're not offering. Thanks.

*This is for you. I just hope you'll have a good life*

P/s : I'm soo over you this time. I'm done. I'm really done. If you happen to be reading this, I'd say, congratulations.

Updated on June 17, 2011